Introduction
A few days ago, that old classic movie “The Wizard Of Oz” was on TV again. How many times have all of us watched Dorothy click her heals together and say “There’s no place like home”? I recently spent the night with a friend and had an enjoyable time, but there was nothing like coming back home to my own bed. There truly is no place like home.
Two of the most important factors in any home are the Mother and Father. Without them, I don’t believe you can really have a “Home Sweet Home.” Without a Mother, where is the love and caring the children need? Without a Father, where is the stable home environment that’s needed?
As the children grow into adulthood, they quite naturally carry the traits and characteristics of their parents. How many times have I noticed the simple words and phrases that I’ve picked up from my Mother and Dad and repeated throughout my lifetime? How many times have I been talking to my sister or friends and noticed that I was talking or acting in ways that I’ve observed my parents behaving?
I’m now 48 and I can recall when I was in my 20’s and thinking how fortunate I was to not only still have both parents living, but they were still married. A lot of other people I knew either had at least one parent who was deceased or they were divorced.
Yes, despite the difficulties that I had while growing up, I was truly blessed to have had my two parents.
Do I have regrets now that they’re gone? Yes, I have a lot of them. There are many things I wish I could go back and change, but time only flows in one direction. Several times before my Daddy died, I had the thought of recording some of his personal history from his childhood on up to adulthood. But that was one of the many things that I kept putting off. Now it’s forever too late.
I hope somehow by keeping this blog I can honor both his and Mother’s memory. Perhaps in some way I can make up for some of the things that I neglected doing. I believe if they were both still here, they would say that I was the best son they ever had. In my opinion, I let them down many times.
In actuality, I’m a rather selfish person. Too many times I felt I should come first. Therefore neglecting the two wonderful people who gave me life. Now they’re both gone and all I have are memories.
I am a pessimist and I have a difficult time remembering the good times I had with Mom and Dad. I can recall too many times when they needed me and I was off doing something else that I thought was more important. I wonder how many times they sacrificed doing something for themselves when they chose to help me instead?
Mother has been gone for over six years. She left us on August 17, 2003. Daddy has been gone less than a month: October 23, 2009. I still mourn the loss of Mother at times. Daddy’s death just doesn’t seem real. It’s something that just wasn’t supposed to happen.
Despite the fact that he had a lot of health problems: Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, Bipolar Disorder, etc. I still look at him as being my “rock and strong point” in my life. Oh, he could be so demanding at times, but he was still my dad.
How I wish I could’ve been there for him when he took his last breath, like I was there for Mother. But some things in life just don’t turn out the way you want them to. Perhaps it’s like a friend told me today. Maybe it turned out just the way God wanted it to turn out.
I chose the nickname “LoneWolf” both because I like wolves and because I tend to be a loner. I keep to myself a lot. Perhaps too much at times. Now, the word alone is very adequate. I still have my sister and we’re closer than ever before. I have very good friends who care about me and check on me regular. But first Mother left us and now Daddy is gone and I feel alone.
But they aren’t totally gone. They will live forever in our hearts and minds. Whenever we recall memories of them they will be here with us. Whenever we close our eyes and see them, they will be alive in our hearts.
